Partial Thanks

When work, life, and social media collide to create the conditions we typically describe as “busy,” one result is that we fail to fully appreciate. We have only enough margin to partially engage in the process of being thankful, which limits our impact.

Looking more closely at being thankful, we might describe it in three steps.

First, there is the moment of simply recognizing that something good has happened. At work, this “good” might be someone’s effort that landed the big win or another’s unselfish moment to teach coworkers how to be more effective. At home, this is our partner’s daily effort to maintain order, the kids helping around the house, and the neighbor walking our trash can up the driveway for us.

For some of us, even the act of identifying the good around us is a cognitive challenge. It’s not that we’re insensitive jerks, it’s just that too often we’re simply looking the other way. (Incidentally, that “other way” is often forward. We sacrifice the moment for the sake of progress.)

Next in the process of being thankful is reflecting on the impact of the good we recognize. Ok, for some things, noticing is good enough. But for the things that matter, there is no way to properly appreciate the good (i.e. be thankful) unless we literally stop what we’re doing, stop talking, stop scrolling, stop competing…and dedicate a moment to exploring the positive effect that is happening as a result.

Reflecting is the hardest step because engineering a pause anywhere in our hectic day is a monumental achievement. Nonetheless, the people doing good for us really do deserve a moment to appreciate their significance. How are they saving us time, energy, and effort? In what ways are they making the team better? What are they doing that we didn’t ask them to do? Discovering the answers is an intentional process.

Finally, it’s time to do something with that awareness by expressing thanks in a sincere, deliberate way. People want to know they matter, that their efforts make an impact. Many will do their work selflessly, but almost all will do it better with praise. Plus, appreciation is free, arguably the most cost-effective activity we can engage in. It is fuel for growing our teams, strengthening our families, and building our communities.

So, being thankful is recognizing the good, reflecting on its impact, and expressing gratitude to those who matter. Most days, we barely get to the first step. Partial thanks. Today, let’s try to go all the way.

P.S. Upon reflecting, I fully recognize that you have many other places you could spend your time. Yet, you choose to make The Military Leader part of your day and part of your leadership journey. I greatly appreciate that you do. I’m thankful for the engagement you create, the impact you have, and for sharing this resource with your people. Without you, this doesn’t exist. Thank you!

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The opportunity before you

The military is full of opportunities, plenty of places you wish you could serve, jobs you wish you had, people you wish you could work with.

Given the military’s sequential, time and experience-based professional development model, most of that opportunity is out of reach or untimely.

One way to overcome this facet is to perform better, to rank higher, to stand out. Why? Because performance begets opportunity. As you progress, the number and quality of opportunities increase. Through performance you reveal potential.

This mentality, however, has a flaw. In doing things that result in the next professional development opportunity, it’s easy to overlook the everyday opportunity that doesn’t count for professional points. The investment in younger leaders, the unexpected but appreciated thank you, the moment of genuine care for a teammate in need. These opportunities don’t show up on the scoreboard. They can’t be communicated in evaluation reports. Bosses won’t discover them.

In pursuit of opportunity, don’t miss the opportunity that makes the most difference.

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Prone to advise

Your rank and authority give you the right.

Your experience gives you the credibility.

The consequences involved make you reluctant to do it any way but yours.

Your busy day makes you impatient.

So, you issue orders and give advice…all day long. This cycle is not a crime, it’s just not the best way to develop your people.

You already have most of the solutions to problems you’ll encounter in your position. However, developing leaders is not about delivering your answers. It’s about coaching others to discover their own.

(Michael Bungay Stanier’s book will help you break the cycle.)

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Climate & Responsibility

We prefer to work for leaders who trust us to make good decisions. The opposite creates a frustrating climate. That kind of leader demands details about unimportant topics, doesn’t ask for input, isn’t interested in anyone else’s efforts.

But it’s a two-way street.

Followers have the responsibility to show that they support the leader’s priorities and will subordinate their own when necessary. They must also be humble enough to know they don’t always have the answer and must be willing to seek help.

If you are a leader, ask yourself which climate you are setting.

(Seth Godin’s post can help. So can Bob Sutton, with 12 Things Good Bosses Believe.)

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Leadership and Likership

It’s true what you’ve heard. Leadership is not about likership.

But if those you lead can’t connect with who you are…
or relate to your perspective…
or aren’t inspired by your emotional engagement…
or don’t believe you will listen to and help them with their struggles…

…the best you’ll get is compliance.

Personality is the conduit over which leadership happens. The only way to deliver your talents to the rest of the world is through personality (akin to emotional intelligence, relatability, charisma, and so on). Without a good conduit, leadership talents lie dormant.

Don’t strive to be liked. Strive to be relatable.

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Who is the Hero?

Every movie has a hero. Luke Skywalker. Harry Potter. Indiana Jones. Even Austin Powers is a hero. The hero is the heart of the movie, the person or thing on which the movie focuses to tell the story. Movies take these heroes on journeys that follow a common path. The hero encounters a problem he can’t solve, a villain he can’t overcome. Then a guide appears to help the hero become the person who can rise to the challenge. Yoda is a guide, so is Gandalf. Then just when you think all hope is lost, the hero uses the guide’s teachings to win the day and defeat the villain.

hero

U.S. Army Soldiers with 1st Squadron, 2nd Cavalry Regiment, provide support by fire during a multinational training event for exercise Puma 2 with Battle Group Poland at Bemowo Piskie Training Area, Poland on June 14, 2018 as part of Saber Strike 18. This year’s exercise, which runs from June 3-15, tests allies and partners from 19 countries on their ability work together to deter aggression in the region and improve each unit’s ability to perform their designated mission. (U.S. Army photo by Spc. Hubert D. Delany III /22nd Mobile Public Affairs Detachment)

Are You Doing Your Most Impactful Work?

What are the most impactful things you do everyday as a leader? What can you do for your team that no one else can? What consistent effect must you have in your organization to create the culture you seek? These are challenging questions, but ones that leaders must answer to achieve their purpose for their teams.

I originally started this post by exploring how easy it is for daily distractions, those Urgent/Important shiny objects, to draw leaders into the weeds of busywork. But if you are a leader, you already know what that feels like. You start the day with good intentions, get distracted by the next big crisis, then pick your head up at 1800 having bounced from problem to problem. Problem solving, however, is not the leader’s most important role.

Instead, the leader’s principal responsibility is to define the landscape for the organization, chart the course it will travel, tend to followers’ needs, and many other “big picture” responsibilities that no one else is qualified to execute. Other key leader tasks include providing vision, shaping culture, developing leaders, fighting for organizational maneuver space, identifying risk, pursuing opportunity, and so on.

It’s a worthwhile exercise to determine the few things that leaders should do everyday to achieve the desired leadership effect. I’d like to take a moment to share mine with you.

impactful

At the Intersection of Values and Hardship

by Austen Boroff

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides relief denied even to prayer.” Mark Twain summarizes the crux of the leader dilemma I found myself in while deployed to Iraq: when is it acceptable to compromise important organizational values to lessen the hardship of an extreme operating environment? The issue arose at the crossroads of a continuous workday in a harsh environment, a new leader assuming responsibility, and the escaping element that music provides.

values

Army Pfc. Matthew Wilson arrives at a tactical assembly area to relieve personnel and resupply ammunition during a mission supporting the Iraqi army’s 9th Division near Al Tarab, Iraq, March 18, 2017. Army photo by Staff Sgt. Jason Hull